BONGO NEWS Satire. Parody. Jokes. JANUARY 19, 2005 Copyright © 2001-2018 Bongo News, Inc.
» back issues

» search site

best of
bongo news

sponsored links

Brad Pitt: You Decide
... Full story

How Teri Hatcher Campaigned For Her Golden Globe
... Full story

Mariska Hargitay Was Half Excited by Her Golden Globe Win
... Full story

Scarlett Johansson's Golden Globes
... Full story

Ted Kennedy to Help in Tsunami Relief; "˜Back in the Drink Again'
... Full story

Bush Diary "“ What, No WMDs?; I'm Abducted by Aliens
... Full story

Paris Hilton Diary "“ I Get Coked Out; Peeing in Public
... Full story

Don King: "˜I'm Going to Disneyland!'
... Full story

Kobe Bryant to Miss Five Games with a Sprained Penis
... Full story

Angels Change Name to "˜The Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim, Palo Alto, Santa Cruz, Bakersfield and Fresno'
... Full story

What Do You Mean You Can't Have Sex?
... Full story

Robot Fighter 4000 AD: Rudy Giuliani
Comic book cover by blorno... Full story

Comics We'd Like to See: BC Hormone
With apologies to BC.... Full story

What, Are You Ignorant?
Stupid Drawings from a stupid stupid man... Full story

Nude Reporter Wins Tsunami Reporting Sweepstakes

Nude Reporter Tsunami insidetsunamicooper
Anderson Cooper in Sri Lanka

NEW YORK — Television news executives celebrated the third week of tsunami news coverage with three martini lunches and high fives. Disaster reporting is good for business. "It reminds you of the awesome responsibility we have," Neal Shapiro of NBC News told Bongo News. "It also reminds you of the awesome profits we can make!"

NBC's Brian Williams broadcast the nightly news from Banda Aceh, Indonesia, with the trademark white makeup under his eyes melting in the tropical heat and streaming down his face like tears. CNN's Anderson Cooper sent emotional broadcasts from Sri Lanka, saying how blond he felt besides the dark Sri Lankans. CBS's Dan Rather got to Asia nine days' late, but immediately began to search through debris, "looking for documents."

Fox News did not send anyone to Asia, but instead put stock pickers on camera to argue with each other about which stocks would gain or lose from the disaster.

But Sharon Reid of WIOI-TV in Cleveland stole the show, stripping off to report in the nude. "Lot's of people had the clothes torn off their backs by the force of the waves," she said, "like this!"

She was the clear ratings winner.

Read these related stories:

personal ad
of the week

Subscribe to Bongo News

bongo recommends

bongo news

Subscribe to Bongo News

Copyright © 2001-2018 Bongo News, Inc. | Terms of service | Privacy policy | How to advertise | About us

The Web's Wittiest News Satire

RSS Feed