BONGO NEWS Satire. Parody. Jokes. JULY 13, 2005 Copyright © 2001-2018 Bongo News, Inc.
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Aruba Judge Orders Release of Disc Jockey; "˜He's Got a Tourist Gig Tonight'
All-Aruba News, All the Time... Full story

Brad Pitt Hospitalized, Million of Women in Sympathy Puke
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Bush Apologizes to African Americans and Native Americans
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Comic book cover by blorno... Full story

Comics We'd Like to See: BC Humpty Dumpty
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Kobe Bryant Resumes Ads for Nike: "Want Sex? Just Do It."

Kobe Bryant nike ad Bryant
Kobe just does it

LOS ANGELES — Nike has resumed using Kobe Bryant in its ads, as part of its $45 million endorsement deal with the Lakers' star.

"Bryant ranks among the very best players in the NBA," said a Nike spokeswoman," and you know what I mean by player, don't you? He's a ladies' man, that one! Anyway, back on the subject of sport, preparation is a key part of his game. So is protection. Kobe uses protection now. And he has good lawyers on retainer in case the girls cry rape."

McDonald's and Nutella, which also had endorsement deals with Bryant, have not resumed using Bryant's name or likeness in their ads.

"We don't think forced sex is consistent with Happy Meals," said a McDonald's spokesman.

"Nor with chocolate sauce," said a Nutella spokesman.

Story by Emma Dubin. Photo by Mike Pasternack

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