BONGO NEWS Satire. Parody. Jokes. DECEMBER 18, 2002 Copyright © 2001-2018 Bongo News, Inc.
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Kissinger, Mitchell, Cardinal Law, Al Gore, Everybody Resigns; But Not Lott
The Bush Administration was reeling this week... Full story

Lott Apologizes for 547th Time
...but the crisis continues... Full story

No More Gore in '04
"You won't have Al Gore to kick around any more."... Full story

Update on Kenyan Election
... Full story

New York's Transit Strike is Called Off
"I'm glad everything worked out well in the end"... Full story

US Policy on Iraq on Hold While Sean Penn Visits the Country

sean penn

WASHINGTON, DC — President Bush announced that he would rethink his entire strategy on Iraq pending the results of Sean Penn's visit there. "When I discovered that Sean had gone to Iraq, I immediately appointed him my Special Envoy there. I want to hear his views on the situation."

Meanwhile, Secretary of State Barbra Streisand is ripped. "How dare he trespass on my turf. What does Sean bloody Penn know about Iran that I haven't already written about on my website? What would an actor know about the Middle Earth? He should leave diplomacy to professionals like me."

Read these related stories:

Bono And O'Neill Switch Jobs (11-Dec-02)

Saddam Has Gas (11-Dec-02)

Arms Inspector Meets With Saddam Hussein (2-Oct-02)

Barbra Streisand is Appointed Secretary of State (23-Oct-02)

Barbra's Column (23-Oct-02)

Lord of the Rings Screws Up (9-Jan-02)

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