BONGO NEWS Satire. Parody. Jokes. OCTOBER 13, 2004 Copyright © 2001-2018 Bongo News, Inc.
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Michael Moore Backs Kerry Charge: Bush DOES Own a Timber Company!
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Sirius Satellite Radio to Pay Howard Stern $500 Million to Make it Obscene

Howard Stern and his squeeze, Beth Ostrosky
NEW YORK — Sirius Satellite Radio will pay shock jock Howard Stern $500 million over five years to fill its satellite radio waves with obscenities and profanities.

Howard Stern currently has an audience of some 12 million people who listen to his obscenities for free. Sirius has only 600,000 paid subscribers. Will Stern's 12 million fans buy satellite radios and pay $12.95 to a month to hear his obscenities on Sirius?

"Nah," said Jose Marquez as we accosted him on a busy New York City street. "I like Howard Stern but I wouldn't pay $12.95 a month to hear his foul mouth. I can get my fill of obscenities by going down to the corner and listening to the ho's swearing at each other over who the corner belongs to, or I can listen to cabbies cursing each other out as they swerve their taxis at each other. I can get that free!"

Luxury automobiles are now being marketed by DaimlerChrysler, General Motors, Ford and Honda offer satellite radio as a factory-installed item. Will the business executives who can afford these upscale autos be surprised when they turn on their fancy radios and get a Stern sexually-explicit broadcast or expletive-filled tirade? Will they like Stern's "Lesbian Dial-A-Date" segment?

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