BONGO NEWS Satire. Parody. Jokes. MAY 29, 2002 Copyright © 2001-2018 Bongo News, Inc.
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Israeli Scientists Produce a Featherless Chicken
Mad scientists at Hebrew University in Israel, while playing with radiation... Full story

Cardinal Law Initiates a Young Priest
... Full story

Freak Show in Cannes; Iman and Elton John Flee the Stage
... Full story

NBC Names Brian Williams as News Anchor to Succeed Tom Brokaw

brian williams
NEW YORK — NBC announced that weird-eyed Brian Williams will take over as anchor of "NBC Nightly News" from Tom Brokaw, who is retiring.

Williams is only 44 and will become the youngest anchor doing an evening newscast.

Brokaw, who is 62, at least has the sense to retire, unlike the aging Dan Rather, who is 70 and seeking a 4 year extension of his contract.

Asked why they chose this journalistic lightweight to anchor the news, NBC officials said they were irresistibly drawn to the white eye liner which Williams puts under his eyes.

Read these related stories:

Dan Rather's Contract to be Renewed for Three Years (8-May-02)

Ad Describing Paula Zahn as "Sexy" is Pulled (16-Jan-02)

Stop the World! Bryant Gumbel Tells CBS He is Quitting "The Early Show" (10-Apr-02)

Talk About Bad Timing (21-Nov-01)

Katie Couric Gets a $60 Million Contract (26-Dec-01)

Jack Welch Agrees To Return The Palace, But Will Keep The Slaves (18-Sep-02)

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