BONGO NEWS Satire. Parody. Jokes. DECEMBER 7, 2005 Copyright © 2001-2018 Bongo News, Inc.
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CBS Picks Katie Couric as Evening News Anchor: "We Didn't Want Just Another Pretty Face"

katie kouric couric
NEW YORK — CBS will name Today Show anchor, Katie Couric, as the replacement for Dan Rather on the CBS Evening News.

"The networks have been criticized over the years for choosing "pretty faces' for the evening news anchors " think of Peter Jennings, Tom Brokaw, Diane Sawyer, even the brief tenure of Connie Chung. Well, we didn't want just another pretty face, and we have certainly achieved that goal, "said a CBS spokesman. "Katie is pretty damn ugly with her lopsided face and too-big grin.

"We did want some journalistic heft, which Katie clearly doesn't have, and someone who appealed to the important youth market, which Katie doesn't do either. But we had to make some trade offs, and not being a pretty face trumped everything else."

Emma Dubin

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