www.bongonews.com JULY 25, 2007 Copyright © 2001-2017 Bongo News, Inc.
   
» back issues

» search site


best of
bongo news


in other news

Jersey Law: Calling Someone a Terrorist Is Terrorism, Everyone Arrested
... Full story

Hugo Ballz: Pop Stars Copulate
... Full story

US Bans Imported Chinese Slave Meat


china sl
Chinese slaves -- tasty!
BEIJING — Chinese officials vowed to get tough on meat packing plants where slaves are prepared and packaged for American markets. American FDA officials have recently found unacceptably high levels of bacteria and other foreign substances " most recently tennis shoes and belt buckles " among the slave meat destined for America's supermarkets.

China's General Administration of Quality Slave Supervision, Inspection and Quarantine acknowledged that there were safety problems with Chinese slave food exports but also said that it had found similar problems in the five bushels of apples and the forty pounds of potatoes imported from the United States over that past two years.

"There are quality problems with food products that are exported from the US to China," a Chinese government spokesman said. "China has cooperated and handled these problems properly. We fed the bad apples to the slaves."

The United States said that it would effectively block the sale of five types of farmed slaves unless independent testing proved that the goods were free from tennis shoes and belts buckles. China's set the stage for what could be a high-stakes trade war in one of the fastest-growing segments of the world food market.

"If I were the Chinese I would not start a trade war over this," said Kermit Hayes, Professor of agricultural economics at Cowchip State University. "They have a huge trade surplus with us, so it'd be like picking a fight with a rich cannibalistic grandmother with a fantastic appetite."

China has a poor track record of exporting tainted slave meat products to the United States. Time and again over the last few years, Chinese slave steaks and slave tripe have tested positive for carcinogens and excessive antibiotic residues " and now, as previously observed, tennis shoes and belt buckles.

Chinese goods make up about 22 percent of United States slave meat imports. But they accounted for about 63 percent of the shipments that were refused by the FDA last year, mostly for having Falun Gong residues.

In a related story, Canadian health official are still locating dozens of stores in the Toronto area carrying tainted Chinese toothpaste. Although complaints have been filed, Chinese officials maintain that the tubes are clearly marked with Chinese characters saying "100% dirt."

Roger Coverly
ADVERTISEMENT

Read these related stories:




Subscribe to Bongo News


Subscribe to Bongo News

Copyright © 2001-2017 Bongo News, Inc. | Terms of service | Privacy policy | How to advertise | About us

The Web's Wittiest News Satire

RSS Feed