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Bush Accidentally Starts the War on Iraq Early
He gets his phone calls mixed up... Full story

Bush is Concerned About the Turds in Northern Iraq
... Full story

Bush is Ashamed of the Dixie Chicks
Bush raps the rock group... Full story

Saddam's Guard Rues the Day He Got His Job at the Palace
Unhappy guard has a look of doom... Full story

The Fighting Wedgies Get Ready For Battle
Thing the theme thong... Full story

Monica Lewinsky is to Host a New Dating Show


fat monica
Fat Monica
NEW YORK — Not only has Bill Clinton been given his own spot on 60 Minutes, but Monica Lewinsky will host a new dating show on TV.

Monica's prime time show, Mr. Personality, will feature men competing for a woman contestant solely via their personality and not by money or power.

"It's a whole new direction for me," said Monica.

Can the stain of Bill's spot on 60 Minutes be removed?

Meanwhile, hostesses are vying with each other to have fat Monica Lewinsky attend their parties. "She adds a touch of class and sophistication to any event," said one hostess, "especially now that she's gained 80 pounds."

"She's so sexy," said another. "No one wears clothes the way she can. They do need drycleaning, however."

"And she's so intelligent," said a third hostess. "Uneducated, but intelligent nevertheless, at least more intelligent than I are."

"She's been at the seat of power," said another, "at waist height."
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